“I have learned a great lesson this last week/2 weeks. I must pay attention to my intentions. I got a little lost for a bit because I allowed my focus to stray from my ultimate goal. I guess I’ve spent so much time and energy trying to identify just what that goal was, I lost sight of it in my search for the hard way to find it.
I remember a number of stories my teacher told me in the 1980’s about always seeking out the tons of ways and heavy energy I would expend to find my way when it was right in front of me all the time and all I had to do was reach out and grab it. I miss Ruth. She’s probably laughing her head off at me right now, but I think she’d be proud to see that I’m finally just reaching out and grabbing what has been there all along.”
I came across a new blog the other day, “Living the Created Life”, and in reading through some past posts I found the above quote.
It made me muse to myself…what things in my life are really just there for me to reach out and take? How much do I make grand gestures in an attempt to achieve a more fulfilling life, attain greater happiness, forge stronger relationships, reach desired goals…how much am I generating “heavy energy” or “expanding” to try and reach it, instead of just reaching for it from where I am? Could it really be that easy? How will we know if we don’t try?
I have been trying to get back into my meditation practice, which is a really good exercise in doing nothing for me. I am awful at having a quiet mind, and I make it worse by surrounding myself constantly with fillers–internet, music, television are always near at hand, ready to give my mind a task or feed it with passive input constantly. I am back on the Artist Way wagon, which always gives me a sort of motivation (permission?) to balance out my daily routine with some nothingness. In mediation, there is no “grasping” at the meditative state. You can’t make it happen–pushing or forcing yourself somehow into a quietude doesn’t work. Instead, you sit and allow it to come. You become restful, bring your energy gently inward so it is ready to open and expand of its own accord. There is no try, only do, right?
And this practice at meditation, coupled with the blog post above, it makes me wonder…what else can I gently set myself ready to receive so I can pluck it when it presents itself? What am I not seeing that is right in front of me, because I am casting about so frantically to find that which is simply waiting for me to see it? What opportunity, what intent, is unrealized because I am not focused in the right direction?
What about you?